And finally… what a dick

An Australian man’s five-year battle to use a crude drawing of a penis as his signature inspired him to enrol at law school, the Sydney Morning Herald reports.

Jared Hyams, 33, used the phallic sign-off on Australian Electoral Commission documents as “a laugh”, but was astonished by the reaction.

He said: “When I did this signature all of a sudden the shit hit the fan. I was receiving letters and phone calls telling me I couldn’t have it. I thought, that’s interesting, why not?”

The ensuing court battles to assert his right to use the signature inspired him to go to law school, where he will graduate this year.

Hyams has faced repeated defeat, but also succeeded in slipping the signature past a number of government agencies.

He said the experience had “sparked something in me”.

However, teachers at his school have been less than sympathetic - with one tutor reportedly refusing to mark an assessment because he used the crude drawing on the plagiarism declaration.

Hyams said: “It’s been an interesting journey, but none of it is resolved. Everything is just left hanging.”

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