And Finally

A man who inadvertently triggered a gun after sitting on it shot himself — in the penis. Cedrick Jelks, 38, was rushed to hospital by Shanekia Roberts, 25, who explained to police that Jelks had been sitting alone in his car before he rushed into their home in a panic, WJXT reports.

Cops have appealed to the public to help track down a bald man who stole steven boxes of a topical hair regrowth product. In a statement, police said it was "not the most hair-raising crime", but they suspected he will "continue committing this type of crime, as 12-14 months of consistent use is nee

In a bizarre mix-up, a man released from a short jail sentence found that a man presumed to be him had been buried in his family plot. Slava Brushkov came home from prison only to find that his neighbours, noticing his sudden absence, had reported him missing.

A handyman who spent three months in prison has been released after it was discovered the cocaine he was apparently in possession of was plaster. Karlos Cashe was pulled over by a police officer who said they noticed white powder in his car. The handyman said it was simply dry wall residue.

A 35-year-old man has tried and failed to get out of jail using the famous Monopoly card. The suspect, who was held on drug charges, presented cops with a 'Get Out of Jail Free' card - but it did not have the stated effect.

A shopkeeper threatened with legal action after he called his shop “Singhsbury’s” has changed it — to “Morrisinghs”. Five years ago, Jel Singh Nagra, 42, was told he could be taken to court by Sainsbury’s, who said the name was too similar to theirs.

A mafioso has been released from an American federal prison, at the age of 100. John “Sonny” Franzese, an under boss to the Colombo crime family, the youngest of the “five families”, was convicted in 1967 of bank robbery.

Queen Elizabeth has been reported to police by one of her subjects for not wearing a seatbelt. An astute TV viewer called the cops as the Queen travelled in a private car to the State Opening of Parliament.

A crime psychologist who recently completed a study of email fraud has been tricked out of £18,000 by a gang of computer fraudsters. Professor David Canter's troubles began when he discovered his email account had been compromised, after friends alerted him to emails purporting to be from him and a

Two alleged thieves were quickly caught after they failed to realise their haul of high-tech goodies were cutting-edge GPS trackers. Around $18,000 worth of GPS tracking devices were stolen from Roambee's Silicon Valley labs, but were recovered within five to six hours after the company equipped pol

A nurse who was forced to take a professional exam, while in labour, has won the right to retake it. Mar Herraiz, 37, had gone 20 hours without sleep and was close to giving birth when, astonishingly, three members of the exam board for her nursing course turned up, insisting that she take the test

A man has been awarded a six-figure sum after a surgeon left him with one testicle — the one he was meant to remove. Steven Haines, 54, had been suffering from pain in his testicle for 15 years.

A wannabe lawyer who was hauled into court on cannabis charges has been shown mercy by a judge he tried to lecture about the enforceability of British laws. Mark Angell parroted pervasive Internet-based conspiracies that all UK laws are maritime laws which do not apply on land, Devon Live reports.

Perth Sheriff Court was forced to delay a case after Crown Office staff admitted they couldn't understand the accused's Geordie accent. Denis Boyd, 38, is on trial over allegations that he sexually assaulted a woman in Perth last year.

A US politician has introduced a new bill to archive the President's social media posts - the Communications Over Various Feeds Electronically for Engagement (COVFEFE) Bill. The snarkily-titled bill has been introduced to the House of Representatives by Mike Quigley, Democrat congressman from Illino